a reason that makes me smile

this is a good feeling

it's good to be just by us,you and me

at last i've fallen in this cliched thing

my heart speeds up double the time

everytime i realize that you'r all mine

that's when you can see my biggest smile

smile,everything you do makes me smile!

i love you

and when you say you do too

there is all this feelings inside me gushing

you can clearly see in and out,me blushing

i don't mind thinking about you all day

going back and forth in my mind about everything you say

day dreaming about our tomorrow

making your frown all my sorrows

you're the one who's captured my heart and head

can't get hold of what others just said

because i was too busy wondering about you

thinking if you were beside what would you do

would you take me by your arms?

or would you tease me, annoy me and then apologise?

would you tell me the joke you heard the other day?

or just  yet, what i feel you'd let me say

yes,this is what you've done to me

anything else,not letting me see

you just don't get off of my head

i'm loosing the battle like you said

I don’t mind though

That’s because I love us so

I want this to last, for the rest of our lives J

breakable yet again!

it was better when i was broken

deep in my sorrows when i was sunken

it was better when i couldn't dream

rather than realise that it's smashed and wake up with a scream

better when i knew nobody was my beside

than know that your promises of always being there is a lie

it was better thinking that i had a luckless romance

rather than trying it again and having the assurance

it was better clinging on to old memories

rather than listening to your fake deeds

something that you wont be doing

like the others you're up just for saying

it's better to be locked up in my room and cry my heart out

rather thank risk it being with you and worry about the doubts

it's better to all day think about him

       rather than be with a replica and remain grim 

        it was better when my heart was broken

       rather than you mending it and yet breaking it      again  

[because break me once shame on thee, break me twice shame on me]

..............

There are so many things that I have in my mind right now. All the things are happening at the same time; good, bad. But the bad things are making me worry about the good things as well,if they are really true and if they are then how long will it be?
you see, that's the problem among most of us. We know we're supposed to live the present forget about the past, not worry much about the future and yada yada yada.But it's hard to follow that path; the same path that we frequently suggest other's to travel.We humans are quite complicated creatures. Well, i can't be that sure about others but i definitely am. When something bad happens to me I'm cursing my fate on why it's always me and why don't i ever get good things (drama queen? i know). when something good happens I'm too busy worrying about loosing it rather than living the moment. I know exactly what to do, I just don't know how.
Right now,I am more than happy. I am well, some what 95% satisfied with my life at the moment.I know that's almost next to impossible but I am. But every time I try to enjoy the moment it suddenly comes to mind that it's too good to be true. Someone teach me how to live and let live :|

Life

Now I know what life is
Not only pain and miseries
But also happiness and laughter
With night and day following after
Sometimes thunder strikes us with pain
And the storm leaves tears and blood stains
But this is just the dark side
After this there is a brighter light
Everything seems so nice
To us the whole world feels fine
We realize that we just have one life
In which we could shine bright
Do not think it is the end when a caterpillar dies
It dies to give out a new butterfly

hope is a synonym of life :D

Grow up

I was clearing up my coop today and and i found this old diary and turning those pages i realized how even i was once the victim of first heart break. All of us have been there, done that. Cliched, I know. It is really dumb and stupid; but to think of it we were nothing but naive dependable. We didn't know what to do and what not to. We had to search for the next steps and the victory is when we grow past that.


It was insane of me to think you and I as us
Now it's time for me to say myself "grow up"
Because you're never coming back


I don't think i can ever like anyone like this
Every time i think about those days I go on a trip
My love is all finished up for others
After you went away i stopped seeing any colors
All i could see was white and black
Everything was sloppy and sad
Why is your name still lingering on my mind?
Why do I get your dreams all the time?
"More of a nightmare" all my friends say
But i simply deny
For it's not only the sad pain you've given me
There are moments that I still cherish
Like my first kiss with you
And all the stupid things that we did do
Just the thought of you makes me high
Thinking about those days I still smile
I tried to give you all my love, pure and divine
But for you it wasn't that fine


It was insane of me to think you and I as us

Now it's time for me to say myself "grow up"

Because you're never coming back

Not again!

I'm on that turning point again
I've been trying to avoid this path
Still trying hard to keep on closing my heart
Because I've been here before
And if I want to come back again, I'm not so sure
It's a long journey
And it's not sure that throughout you're going to be there with me
This very thought makes me shiver

That's why to take a step ahead I quiver
I don't want to be any body's play doll
Not prepared for yet another fall
Because after that it's hard to even crawl
Because this time i want to make it a last call